Vanilla and Non-Vanilla Sex

Sexually, what do "vanilla sex" and "non-vanilla sex" mean?

Everybody defines these two terms differently. Generally speaking, the idea of vanilla sex is to have sex with the basic ingredients. We’re not talking about kinky sex here – we’re talking about having traditional, everyday sex, oftentimes associated with the missionary position.

Non-vanilla sex is the term used to describe sexual acts which involve kinky fetishes and fantasies. Some people may prefer the term "kinky sex", while others may refer to their kink as something else.

Some also define non-vanilla sex as sex without intercourse. The term is often used to describe other sexual activities, such as cunnilingus (oral sex to the vulva) and fellatio (oral sex to the penis). These activities are not always considered "vanilla" because they involve some form of non-traditional penetration.

The following list includes some other examples of non-vanilla sex activities:

  • BDSM (Bondage, Domination, Submission, and Masochism) - participants use roles during sex that are mutually agreed upon, typically by using a contract.
  • Anal sex - refers to anal penetration. This act can include fingers, objects, dildos, or other objects.
  • Fisting - the insertion of both hands into the vagina.
  • Gang bang - when two or more people have sex with the same person.
  • Sucking - involves the mouth or lips touching the genitals or anus.
  • Spanking - involves hitting someone in the buttocks, using a hand or implement like a paddle.
  • Threesome - includes more than two people having sex with each other.
  • Voyeurism - the act of watching others have sex.
  • Foot worship - involves the act of having sex with feet and toes.
  • Shibari - refers to the practice of tying knots or strings around the wrists or neck.
  • Tantra - is a style that focuses on sexuality and has an emphasis on the use of breathing and massage to enhance sexual energy.

Not everybody is into non-vanilla sex, so it’s a good idea to discuss your kinks with your partner(s). Consent among all parties is important.

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